Last night I was looking through a recent journal. It was full of creative doodles, sermon notes scribbled excitedly, my own lyrics and poetry... some of it was actually quite good. Most of it was written during times of prayer or reflection with God. I realized I haven't created on that level in quite some time.
Our church has set aside the first few weeks of the year to devote to God. Last week was the time I chose to do some fasting, praying, be more intentional about getting deeper into scripture. It was quite a week. I had some very obvious struggles on day 1... major car issues, family health issues, etc. As the week went on, I saw the struggles become less obvious externally but more difficult internally... issues of pride, recognizing how I have not been nourishing my soul well, etc. God is so good to show me these things. As the week went on I saw blessings and very obvious answers to prayer. I was also waking up in the middle of the night with songs in my heart ... and they were staying there. It was great. That was just last week. Yesterday I almost wanted to start fasting again, just to get my heart back in such a focused state.
Honestly, it doesn't take long for me to get distracted. I didn't make any resolutions going into 2011, but my sincere desire is to be healthy and consistent. To be filling my soul, body and mind with good things so that I am in that place where songs and creativity is pouring out of me on a regular basis. I am happy that in a lot of ways I have maintained a certain level of health, but I'm ready for more growth and more fruit in my life.